How Do I Find My Heaven?
Every faith has truth. The teachers may vary, and yet, the messages remain the same. Does it really matter whether you worship Buddah, Christ, or any other God - your God? All we want is a world filled with compassion and good. If that isn’t where you stand, try hard to find a home that soothes your soul. Wouldn’t that make us happy?
There is a story in the Bible about a widow putting all she had in the offering box. Her donation’s value was tiny compared to elaborate amounts of money the wealthy gave, yet, it was she who was truly blessed. It wasn’t the amount, it was the fact that she gave all she had for something she believed in - that is pure faith if I’ve ever seen it. Even if the Bible isn’t your guide, take this woman’s dedication and learn from it.
I have mentioned that I was raised in a Seventh-Day Adventist predominant house. I have seen more arguments end in anger about whether tithe is 10% of our gross or net earnings - and I mean real arguments. It occurred to me as a child that society has written the guidelines for entering heaven, but I don’t buy it. Does anybody really think there is a count of net vs. gross donations? I have to believe there’s more to it than that.
I choose to not follow a religion, but I do believe in a God. I don’t know Him as well as I should. In truth, it’s a struggle finding something I whole-heartedly believe in, so much so that I would give all I had for the cause. I would love to say I have that bravery, that I possess that amount of faith, but I would be lying. I find myself believing solely because I need to know there’s an afterlife. I don’t care what it looks like, I just need to know that the people I have loved and lost will say, “Welcome home!”.
I know that many of you have strong faith and feel comfortable with what you believe in; I admire that more than you will ever know and I read every post you write. I do take it to heart, every single one.
I do need to ask, how do I find what you have? I beg you to tell me. I feel my mom’s presence, it both comforts and haunts me at the same time. Does she know how hard I am trying to get to her? Is she keeping my dad going so I won’t have to lose him too?
The thought of him leaving kills me just a little with each bout of laughter we share, with each morning walk we take. What will I do when he goes away? Who will I have then?
You see? I struggle just like the rest of you. I grieve and am uncertain about most things except the people I love. They get all I have to offer. Right now, they are my heaven. They are a beautiful group of boys who kiss me good morning and good night, my Katie, and even Rob. That will have to do until I find out the rest for myself.
I won’t have a shred of doubt when I hear the words, “Welcome home!” I’ll really believe then, and I will truly be at peace. That is my prayer for us all.
Have a great weekend! Let’s talk on Monday, I’ll bring the coffee. -Ruth
In Loving Memory of Roy Hirschkorn - my deepest condolences to his family and friends.